Can Cats Be Trained?

Oh, can you tell by the title that I am racking my brain for something to post about tonight?

LOL.

Hades and Azrael, though I love them dearly, have very little respect for me.

Tim tells me this is my own fault.

Probably true.

If Azrael whines, I pick him up.

If Hades misbehaves, I don't discipline.

I don't yell. I cuddle. (Umm...still think I should have kids?)

Here's what it gets me:

5AM, Hades sitting on my chest (and by the way, he's not a feather), and Azrael biting my head. Yes, biting my head. (It is his way of saying, 'Hey Mom, I'm hungry. Here's what I'd like to be doing to food in my bowl right now.')

Mind you, Tim is sleeping less than a foot from me. Would they dare attempt this kind of behavior with him? Never. Why? Because when they behave this way, I either:

A. Get up and feed them
B. Get up and kindly escort them out of the room and shut the door until I am ready to get up.

It is more often than not option A, because option B results in Hades scratching at the bottom of the door until I do get up, while his brother sits by his side and eggs him on.

If they attempted this behavior with Tim, the result would be the following:

A. Punting across the room.

6PM, I come home from work and am greeted with yowling and desperate maneuvers toward the kitchen, as though they haven't eaten in days. They do not relent until they are fed.

Again I ask, Do they do this to Tim?

Wouldn't even dream of it.

Tim enters the kitchen, and Azrael and Hades sit on the dividing line between the carpet and the linoleum, on either side of the kitchen entrance, like little kitty gargoyles.

Tim retrieves their bowls.

They sit like statues.

Tim fills their bowls.

They quiver a little, but they don't move.

Tim puts their bowls on the floor, tells them "OK. Good boys!" and they run, like greyhounds released from the starting gate, and slobber all over themselves devouring their dinner.

If they move during this process, one short, loud "Hey!" from Tim freezes them in their tracks.

He tells me it is all about respect.

I wonder what Cesar Millan would say?